It has finally dawned on me that there is more to loosing weight than just knowing a lot about eating well and exercising - unfortunately its just not as simple as all that!
It's a journey - not a short vacation but a long, long trek - sometimes in the wilderness where lettuce and apples are plentiful and the chocolate is in short supply. You can grumble like the Israelite's and complain that the manna is just not enough or you can have faith and know that good food is enough to sustain you - any more is excess.
I have filled lots of my life with finding out how to lose weight. I know what a "good" diet looks like - lots of fruit and vegetables, lean meats, whole grains and low fat dairy products. And that we should be exercising for at least 30 minutes a day.
But you know what? Knowing all that stuff didn't change a thing about how I looked. It did make me feel worse about my size and lack of discipline and time though. It also exposed lots of contradictions - eat potatoes, don't eat potatoes, don't eat chocolate, eat some chocolate, red meat is bad, red wine is good, fad diets are bad (but I guess it depends on the definition of 'fad')
I lost 13 kgs last year but 5 of those have crept back on and are threatening to bring their mates over. I am starting today to stop their advance!
And even though I know all this stuff I still didn't "get it" - obviously. Now I'm not too sure that I've 'got it' all yet but I have got some stuff. I am lighter than a year ago - and sometimes I forget that. I still look in the mirror and see a big girl - but hey - I am lighter. Perhaps I need to celebrate the small achievements more.
And I have got that exercise is important and heaps of fun - if you let it.
I joined the gym and quickly became addicted to the endorphin rush you get from exercise. i had heard athletes talk about it but never beieved that it existed for real people - like me.
Now don't get me wrong - some days it is hard, real hard, to work out, or even get to the gym but I feel so much better when I do that it makes me want to go even after a day of work + children + chores + stuff.
So I know a lot of stuff but I dtill have a way to go through the wilderness, with a few gym trips thrown in for good measure. I am focussing on one thing at a time - and at the moment it is making good choices and enjoying fruit and vegetables. Wish me luck.